David prayed, create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me. Psalm 51:10
That wasn’t a David-only prayer. It was a prayer for all humanity. Our human heart needed an overhaul because of the fall. Our old heart couldn’t carry us further.
Create in me a clean heart, O God!
God’s response – JESUS!
Jesus died for our sin
He paid the price.
Nothing is owing.
Zero balance.
Our slate is clean.
We got a new heart.
A brand new heart.
Selah….(pause and think about it)
Anyone who is in Christ is New
You have a righteous heart in Christ,
He is alive in you.
He reigns, he rules in you
Now in practice…let’s take stock, what’s going on in your heart….
When someone seems to pay attention to you or someone ignores you
When someone seems to accept your opinion or someone rejects your ideas
When someone seems to praise you or someone complains about you.
When someone seems to help you or someone abandons you.
When someone seems to give you peace of mind or someone disturbs your peace.
When someone seems to be barging into your space or someone gives you your space
When you seem to be in charge or when you seem to be losing control
When you seem to be a very important person or when you seem to be taken for granted
When you seem to have a clear picture of tomorrow or when you are not sure of what tomorrow may bring
When you seem to be getting it right or when you seem to be losing on all sides
What is in your heart?
JESUS!!!
Remember that, you are not trying to be like Jesus, you already are.
That’s the truth, Christ is in you, however, in real life, you need to learn how to think through and handle a stressful situation. And you must trust God through this process.
Here is a formula to help you. P-E-S-T
I call it the PEST formula. I have created the acronym so it can be easy for you to remember. If you don’t do this, your relationships and in turns the purpose for your existence will continually be under attack. In short, many Christ filled individuals suffer and their relationships suffer as well. Start practicing PEST from today and you will see how easy it is to communicate with others. You will also see that you will be able to clearly hear God when you start mastering this.
- PAUSE– Always pause before responding. This is good when you are happy or not. Pause; count to 15 seconds in your mind, don’t respond in hurry. Proverbs 25:8 Do not go out hastily to argue your case; Otherwise, what will you do in the end, When your neighbor humiliates you?
- EMOTIONS– It’s important to be aware of your emotions and the other person’s (check body language and emotions of the other person as well). Don’t jump to conclusions and don’t say anything that is not proven (like you always annoy me) because that’s not true; though it feels like it. Proverbs 16:32 He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, And he who rules his spirit, than he who captures a city.
- SHOES– Put yourself in the other person’s shoes. Try to think about why you could have done or said that…and you may be able to see why you don’t need to attack your opponent or defend yourself. It helps. Don’t forget to put away any assumptions you have about the person. 1 Corinthians 10:24 Try to do what is good for others, not just what is good for yourselves.
- TIME– Buy more time to calm down and think- Postpone the rest of the conversation if you need time to cool off. Proverbs 15:1 A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger.
This process helps you think clearly and it does help to bring calm to the situation at hand.
Practical Example;
You sit down to dinner with your spouse after you both have had a long stressful day at work. Your spouse asks angrily “why is the laundry piled up?” This makes you realize that you do a lot more of the housework and it seems ridiculous to you that he/she could say that.
Now let’s use the PEST formula
P – …..count to 15 seconds in your mind
E – Then say: You know it’s hard to not get angry when I hear comments like that from you,
S – Then say; though it sounds like you have had a really bad day.
T – How about we both relax a bit and talk about this later?
This approach usually works. It disarms and reduces tension easily. If it doesn’t work the first time, it may be because the tension in your relationship has really piled up and you may need to try it a few times before you start to see its effect. While you do though, you will get better at keeping your emotions in check and be able to relate to the person in love.
Love is the best solution always.
If there is righteousness in the heart, there will be beauty in the character.
If there is beauty in the character, there will be harmony in the home.
If there is harmony in the home, there will be order in the nations.
When there is order in the nations, there will peace in the world.-Confucius
Create in me a clean heart, o God. And renew a right Spirit within me.